Sunday, September 13, 2009

Signs that you're a Snob

(warning: mother tongue content)

From Chico's blog entitled "Strange Fruit"

i just remembered who i am. =)

The Top Ten Signs That You’re A Snob

Vampgirl – Someone sent me messages to my YM asking why I wasn’t answering. My only reply: “Simple, I don’t chat with jerks like you.”

Carmine – I’m a big reality TV fan, especially Survivor. One time someone asked if I also follow the local version, and I replied: “Sorry, pero pag local na, ayoko na.”

Carmine – A friend asked me to accompany him to Divisoria for xmas shopping. I said: “Would you like it if you got a gift bought from Divisoria?”

Carmine – A friend has a Nokia E90. When asked if it’s easy to use while driving she said, “How would I know? I have a driver.”

Ghildon – When an officemate was offered chicacorn, he said,”I don’t eat chicken food.”

Dru – If you tell people, “I’m broke, but I’m not poor. There’s a difference.”

Knightdriver – When a jeepney cut me rudely, I rolled down my window and shouted, “Kung magmaneho ka, parang may pambayad ka ha!”

Jedi Mstr – If someone asks you if you have the Starbucks planner, and you say, “Ew, you mean its free if you drink enough coffee?”

Dru – I never speak to anyone unless they say my name. Bawal ang sutsot or hoy.

Mai – When a friend asked if I went to the Glorietta sale, I said, “I don’t shop pag sale.”

No name – If you’re talking about something interesting and that person says: “And I care because..?”

SPY Shadow – If you offer her sorbetes and she says: “They don’t call that ‘DIRTY’ for nothin’.”
Geyp – Girl 1: “Do you watch teleserye?” Girl 2: “Ew. Even my yaya doesn’t watch tele-whatever.”

Simon Walker – “Forgive me, you’ve obviously mistaken me for someone who gives a damn.”

Maya – My boss once told an officemate: “I will not reply to your text unless you spell each word completely and correctly.”

Boknoi – After being served inihaw na pusit, a balikbayan said: “Back home, we call that bait.”

No name – When a co-employee was invited to get coffee in the pantry vendo, she said: “Sorry, I don’t drink instant.”

Dyosaimma – When the agents ask me in the mall if I already have a credit card, I answer: “Marami, bakit?”

Purple – My dad, bragging about a bargain he got, tells me: “Alam mo ba kung magkano strap ng watch ko? 20 pesos!” I go: “Hmm. Halata.”

La Senyorita – When a bunch of boys asked for our numbers, my bestfriend smiled and said: “Sorry, but girls with bodies like us, don’t talk to boys with faces like yours.”

Jun13 – While paying at the counter, the cashier asked my friend:”Miss, may advantage card po kayo?” She answered: “Wala. I don’t need discounts.”

Acer – When someone approaches to ask you if you remember them from a long time ago: “Tell me again why I should remember you?”

Caricatura – I said this to friend from Ateneo who admonished me for not watching the UAAP finals: “Sorry, I was busy synthesizing Alain Touraine’s theory on social movements and Jurgen
Habermas’ idea of a liberal democracy. So…who won?”

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Not thinking, Rather feeling.

To be sarcastic, detached and tactless is really not working for me right now.

... and if i were to continue writing (rather blogging) about what's left of my research (marriage whatnots) and my pet project, i would need to find my center (after being shattered one time too many).

After all, a challenge is a challenge. To be in a war with just a quarter of ammunition intended can get you killed.

Ergo... i'm hibernating.

Friday, September 4, 2009

The last installment

Course now concludes what had happened.

After the crash course teaching English, the 10 spots became tangible. The 10 spots were chosen through our submitted resumes and a round of interview with five interviewers.

Needless to say, i was one of the chosen few. there were 11 spots that was opened, and i was SHOCKED with the choices made. Keeping in mind that i myself was a part of this charade, and that i was observing everybody, and teaching in an adult class i have quite some practice when it comes to evaluating people.

One: They chose some of the WORST speakers. If you don't know what i'm talking about, i would give you an example.

"sit her." (i said HER, not HERE!!)

"okey cheldrens, we are going to red a stowry...." (i've had enough)

Two: They chose the loud ones who are not very smart, can speak better korean than english.

Three: They chose a few of the promising people i noticed

Four: They chose me. I'm intense, a sociopath, and i'm a weirdo.

When they chose the 11 people, they forgot to choose the eager and the diligent.

So there we were, sitting in a conference room, and yet another round of orientation. What was expected, what needs to be done, when we would be going to war, and when payday would be. Skipping all the insensible whatnots, the chosen few will train a bit more, prepare the necessary materials or flashcards, the works that need to be done in preparation, to teach kids.

Then the issue with time arrived: i work 6:00 AM to 8:00 AM. The time schedule that was given is 10:00 AM to 4:00 PM. then back to my work to have 6:30 to 8:30 class. If i do this, it'd be a slow suicide, and i will never see my kids.

I gave up my spot and asked for one of the diligents to take my place instead. Three hours later, one of the wives called and asked me who i chose, because one of the apathetics was there instead.

holy poo on toast!

anyway, i don't care. i stopped caring the moment i took the bus home the same day. If i were to compete for the same position with one of these girls, it'd be too easy. But then again, someone forwarded my name in Gwangju University to teach English. I'm waiting.

**EDITED AGAIN: after this post? i highly doubt anybody from THAT place would want anything to do with me. i'm not waiting anymore, rather, i'm giving my thousand percent (as always) to what i do.

*** EDITED FOR THE THIRD TIME: ... just go figure.

Sunday, August 30, 2009

The Hopefuls

In this post, i am not about to have tact. It's not for the weak, and definitely not for the patriotic.

The women i encountered...

I had to endure two weeks in this place. To have an intelligent conversation is wishful thinking. The place is swarming with matchmaking made in some places. There were three cases that were not: Mine, a 30-something woman who is doing a matchmaking business, and another one who used to work with her now-husband (aka office romance). The others in this place, disliked me heartily. They thought i was showing off by asking questions.

Like i cared.

First day: the first thing that i have noticed is that these women cannot speak English. Some of them can understand Korean better than English, and it was painful to listen to them. I have encountered my share of bad speakers, but this particular group takes the cake. I mean, COME ON! They're all aspiring teachers and they cannot even make a structured sentence! The older woman who used to clean my dorm room five years ago speaks better English than most of these women. My father-in-law, who has no idea when it comes to English speaks BETTER than most of these aspiring teachers.

Never mind the accent. That we can work with.

Much like a high school classroom, you would be able to identify who's who and what's what. The class clown, the eager, the quiet, the diligent, the ones who are there because of the ride, the weirdo (me), and the show offs. There was a woman there who wanted to show off. She was sitting in front and she wanted to make an impression that she is (was) a teacher, she taught high school (i did too), and that she knows what she needs to do.

Till i spoke (bwahahahaha!!). That put her into her place. One thing about reijene is that you can't strut your stuff if it ain't better than hers. Teaching had always been my passion. It's not just something i do for a living. It's something i do with my whole soul poured into. It's not to brandish to the whole world that i am smart. It's not something to boast about. It requires humility, to a T.

Keeping in mind that these were all on the first day. I was planning to shut up and listen (and i failed miserably), but because of that show off parading what she used to be (before marrying her old korean husband) to the whole class, and bringing up archaic and phased out teaching styles, i couldn't resist it.


I was observing these women. I went full blast friendly without them noticing what i was trying to hide (my annoyance about their tastes, for one). They thought i was just a clown. Course some of them would still be called pretentious, but i was able to make the class laugh at my antics.

reijene says... I have a knack of knowing a person just by looking. I don't need to ask questions. My speculations are usually accurate. These girls (I'm not to call them women) are not ambitious enough for anything, but to get married, have kids and get it over with. They're married because... maybe one of these things would be their reason, but I'd go for the most obvious: they want a greener pasture without any effort but their own vaginas. They're there because they need to earn money, they don't have any working experience, and their idiot Korean husbands who cannot speak English had given up on Korean women. But 45% of these women are promising.. very promising indeed. An intensive personality training and they'd be more powerful than i am.

And no, they cannot speak English properly. Some could, but most of them can't. My 6:00 student can speak better than 85% of the class! Not to mention wrong pronunciation of simple words (i.e pear, sheep vs ship or bitch vs beach). Wrong usage of words, wrong sentence formation, wrong grammar terminologies, wrong.. wrong.. WRONG!! Needless to say, i am eating my words: I want us to have jobs, i want the migrant women to have jobs. I want us to compete with the NS society when it comes to teaching. Now i just can't wish for it. Because i really am for quality, not quantity.

How can they compete if they can't even be up to that level? How can they teach without a good command of English? How CAN they teach with their sucky pronunciation and their crappy disposition? WHAT CAN WE SHOW THE ENTIRE NATION other than we can understand English better than Koreans, and yet we cannot even express it?

To be a teacher you have to look and DRESS the part.We can't be teachers with stereotype stamped on our foreheads and dressed like some wrinkled sluts after a night job, or a house maid for that matter.

After hearing (rather reading) the news that SMOE and GEPIK dropped 100 (or more?) NS who were supposed to do a lower level English, and the news that migrant women are about to be placed in schools, or charity cases, or house to house halfway through the course, i felt awful. Awful as i was a jobhunter not too long ago, and i know how it feels to be dropped like a hot potato to make way for someone you think cannot be better than you.

And with those thoughts, my sincerest apologies to the NS society. As much as i hate to admit it, most of these women cannot teach. They cannot do the part. They lack everything necessary to be effective in teaching.

**i just wish this photo was taken in a 180 degree angle, it'd have looked much better! i look like i have cankles, and had added an extra 5 kg to my 47 kg disposition!!!**

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Crash Course ENGLISH TEACHER Training Program for migrant wives in Gwangju just ended.

For the first time in my life here in Korea, i have decided to swallow my pride, remove the stick up my ass, and put up with one of the programs the government offers to migrant women. Exactly two weeks ago, down here in Gwangju, a similar program happened.

*edited* she asked for her picture to be removed. this blog had stirred **** itself.

Knowing myself, i have become rather judgmental, but i do it with a fair amount of knowledge, and this time, i can honestly say: KOREA'S GONE MAD.

To start off, this program was in the news a couple weeks ago and i remembered being skeptical with the idea. One: there weren't any details. When the news came out, it only stated that it's for the "benefit and the well being of migrant women in the Korean society" crap. I thought they'd be doing some kind of secretarial, or office management, or clerical crash courses. And it stated: To those who had never had a professional job experience. Okay.. i guess that will not qualify me for a spot. And even if i do, i won't. Seriously, whoever said that working in an environment with 95% of the staff cannot understand a word you're saying is NOT stressful, or is LESS stressful than being a stay-at-home momma, i guess it'd be a matter of opinions, but moi? not unless you're job includes bringing folders to every table, or typing something put on top of your desk and you're basically nonexistent... then why not.

APPARENTLY, the "training course" turned out to be an "English teaching training program" that would be covering the basics of teaching up till HIGH SCHOOL. After experiencing massive rejections from the Korean hagwons, and public schools, even though i already have a job, i have decided to go. Just in case it doesn't work out with Global. Anyway, it stated that it's free. Not to mention, it was going to give us (if we're good enough), a 5-hour job everyday that'd pay 600,000 Won (10 spots); and a recommendation from the establishment itself if we don't get hired after the program. If we were recommended by the institute, it's about 75% sure hire. The remaining 25% would be our effort. If all else fails, one of the instructors would recommend those who won't be able to fish even one.

Moving along...

As all "schooling" goes, there's a deal-breaker: cannot be absent, cannot be late. Be late 3 times, it's equivalent to one absence; be absent three times, and you're not bound to get a cert. Knowing us? Being LATE is a part of our culture, (unbelievably embarrassing). And sure enough, 45% of the class were always late, and it was unnoticed. I did because after work (8 AM), husband and i would drive there, look for a place to have breakfast, and at 9:15, I'd be waiting. The program starts at 10. They gave us coffee and tea with some crackers or fruit at the back of the room, which, would be gone as soon as the women arrived. There were 23 participants including me.

I was kinda looking forward to this program. Why? Being a teacher (sometimes), it's good to be a listener once in a while. It's amazing to be just a part of a class, and not be the speaker. Oh, who am i kidding. Two hours after the program started i was immediately labeled as a show off. I have too many questions, too many answers, too many too much, and the women training us was flustered by what i ask or how i answered. The Korean woman training us was from Korea After School Program (i applied there), which, you can just imagine my excitement. I thought it'd be something innovative, or diverse, different from what i do, or something with a fresher uptake.

I couldn't be more disappointed.

But there were more instructors. One from Gwangju Women's University, another from a kindergarten (i was not listening) but she was amazing with story-telling and crafts, from Chonnam University who had the most helpful topic (two hours, sigh), and more. I really wasn't paying attention much as they're all speaking in Korean, and are trying to help, but they were giving me something that i have already known for a while. Including classroom management. I was excited with lesson planning, as Koreans have a different uptake to it. And they do: it's more tedious than the normal lesson planning.

But basically, that's just it. To me, it had very little input, but i am looking forward to the recommendation that this 50-hour program did. Why?

Just because. (^.^)

At the very last day of this program we did demo classes. As there were 23 participants, and 5 hours of class time, not to mention two instructors who wanted two separate demo classes, we were crunched with time. I prepared four very different, and still related topics. However, as agreed, with the Filipina teacher, we were to do a 10-minute each. With the Korean teacher, we were to do 20-25 minutes, and since time was really not enough, we were grouped, and a demo class with group effort would be done. I was not supposed to do the demo for the Korean instructress, but she pulled me aside and asked...

did you prepare for a demo class?
"yes.." (and started to have yet another sneaking suspicion..)
"i know you would. they're all here to watch you."

HYPERVENTILATING.. HYPERVENTILATING!!! moi? again? i thought i explained to her that i should be giving this chance to someone else? Time and again, when there's supposed to be something that was asked of us to do, like a dummy-demo of how to, the migrant women would clamour for me, and i would (rather sharply) respond that i am not to do it, because they should try it. But sometimes, just for the sake of their improvement, i did. And usually, my style was picked up.

That woman had been vocal from day one that i was the brightest (?) among the group. She called me once or twice to help her with the class, and to explain a bit further what she was trying to say, not to mention bring up the crucial points that she sometimes missed. She gives me intriguing compliments, or insults. SO i had no choice. I had to do the demo class instead of the other member.

"Charismatic" was what i heard (me smiling ear to ear) from the observers.
"Excellent performance" from the instructress.
... and dagger looks from the other groups. LMAO. so sue me.

So there... it's all done. I know i gave it my thousand percent, with my kids as the collateral damage. They have forgotten about me. Two weeks. The first week was barely anything, as i was only trying to catch up with the missed lessons (students absent most of the time), but second week? Monthly level test was coming, and the infos that i needed was given to me on a sturday, with a deadline on tuesday morning, with three abilities to be tested: written, spoken, and grammar. Level test was Wedensday, test results should be given by thursday, and evaluation by friday. On top of preparing for my four demo classes. I barely had time to sleep or eat, let alone watch my kids.

So after all everything? All the activities and things i have prepeared is now at the hands of my four year old, and he loves everything i made. And this weekend is dedicated for my two kids, and two kids alone.

But this doesn't end here. A part two, is on a brewing session, and it'd deal with the aspiring teachers.

Monday, August 24, 2009

It really doesn't make much sense, but...

i'm thinking my prejudice had started to subside,

Sunday, August 23, 2009

i changed her oil, she changed my life!

After surviving what i believe to be the worst test i could have ever done to myself, i move forward to what I'm hoping to be a brighter future. what i did was something i would bury together with the stick up my ass, and know that from the center of this little place i call home, i have someone who will make sure that my feet would be on the ground.

That said....

We proceed to the second installment of my highly uncaring thoughts.

Arranged marriage. Who and WHY would anybody even try and subject themselves to it?

As defined online, an arranged marriage is a kind of marriage arranged by someone else other than the couple getting married (which, in my opinion, is no better than matchmaking made in wherever). In the olden days, it usually is done by parents to pair their heirs (too rhyme-y?) to ensure their family wealth (somewhere in Europe), to uphold the family honor (China), according to social standing (India), to have babies (Africa), unification of two powerful families (Islam), it could go on and on here, but we should stop it there.

The question that i want to dig is this: why would anybody even dream of it? I get that when Princess Fiona wanted to marry Prince Charming is because she thought she didn't have a choice... along came Shrek. But the point of arranged marriage is usually beyond the two people getting married. They're just puppets to do a task for a brighter (?) future.

My mother, she was almost a part of this arranged marriage. Maybe one of the reasons why she married Dad is because she also didn't want to be subjected to it. I remember the stories, how the man she was supposed to marry came from a very rich Islam family, how her dowry was paid in advance, and three times the amount that was agreed upon, why she was chosen (she has two sisters), and how she escaped...

She did escape, she eloped with my Dad. How romantic... (excuse me while i throw up)

Moving along.... Just like what i did with matchmaking, i went in search of some mail order brides. I went poking, clicking, searching, the works that you do to have a good research....
They're beautiful. No other word for it. Sure there's a possibility that they're all photoshopped, or the infos are tweaked so that they'd be this perfect slim girls with long hair and gorgeous eyes. I don't get WHY.

Gold diggers? No wonder we cannot get past stereotyping.

Love? (excuse me while i throw up again) anybody that beautiful (agency) is sure to have any man drooling.

Dating failures? Who doesn't?

Security reasons? ... again, no wonder the stereotyping wouldn't stop.

Sex? err... wha...?!

whatever gave these girls/women the idea that getting married to a foreigner is an easy task, they should have tried being married first to their own kind.

marriage as i keep on mentioning, is not something to take on lightly. to be a mail-order bride, it's like being a housemaid; paid. And used for sex. If you know someone that after being arranged to marry to a complete stranger, and found it easy, let me know. I'll conduct an interview myself.

meanwhile, excuse me while i brew a fresher idea for my next surge of words.